Snapshots of Boise

I'm Not Riding Your Ass, Dude - But I Am Laughing At It

I'm a big fans of vehicle personalizations that are creative and sexually suggestive, so of course this sticker on the back of a white SUV caught my eye. But seeing such a sticker is only the beginning. Without question, you're then obliged to pull alongside the vehicle and check out the driver. After all, if she has the gumption to ride around with a sticker like that on her back end, she must be a little hottie who knows how to flaunt it.

Sometimes, however, the greatest of disappointments ensues. Sometimes the lady is, well, less than desirable, and you neither want to ride her ass nor pull her hair in any situation. But this particular instance ended up being much worse. Think Crying Game. Yep, there was a dude driving, with no one in the passenger seat.

This brings up a very important rule to live by if you are a man:

Never, I repeat, NEVER let your wife, girlfriend, or daughter put any overly female decorations on her vehicle, especially if they contain any sexual innuendo. No matter how unlikely you think it is, you WILL end up driving that vehicle at some point, which makes you vulnerable to seriously embarrassing blackmail and/or ridicule.

So when your wife says she wants to get license plates that say "VNDLGRL", nip that thought in the bud immediately. Likewise, if your girlfriend has this sticker on her SUV, get yourself a razor blade and some alcohol and immediately remove it. You can thank me later.